When #2 Davin was born I had very little fears at first. I'd been there done that, or so I thought. It wasn't until I arrived home with our new family member that it really hit me that I now had to divide my time, my attention between a very needy new born and my high maintenance 3 year old. Not to mention my 2 dogs, 2 cats, 2 fish tanks, my house, myself and oh yah my husband too. I'm forgetting to eat, to sleep, and to shower. My days have become a blur of bottles, diapers, bum wiping (both boys), tidying, needing a nap, and trying my hardest not to yell, or just plain snap!
All you new mom's out there can relate I'm sure. I think to myself "OMG I kind of smell, okay when was the last time I showered? Thursday? What day is it anyway?" The good thing about all this is there is some balance, believe it or not. I don't feel the need to bring a baby monitor to listen for Davin when I leave the room to do laundry. As a mother of #2 I know if he crys for a moment, he'll live. If I don't get that bottle in his mouth the second he wakes up, he'll live. If his sleeper has a bit of spit up in it, he'll live...and so will I. So in that regard there is a reprieve from the insanity. But when he sleeps it's Evan's time. When baby doesn't need me Evan does. I've tryed my best to give him my attention when baby doesn't need it. But I've reached a bit of a burn out stage. I just don't feel like it!!! I'm tired, I'm grumpy, I'm hormonal! I don't want to clean up playdoe bits any more, I don't feel like reading or making crafts. I'm running out of idea's! I feel horrible for feeling this way. But what can I do? I just have to swallow it and read that book to Evan for the hundredth time, I have to clean up the playdoe bits, I have to find a craft idea some where in my half asleep brain.
I look into my future weeks with feelings of pure dread. What am I doing to do when hubby goes back to work? What am I going to do with Evan everyday? How am I going to make it through a day when Davin is awake till 1am, and wakes me up again at 5 am, then Evan is up at 6am? How am I going to function without setting the house on fire because I left the oven burner on? I've been told you just do it, you survive. I guess I'll see...
All you new mom's out there can relate I'm sure. I think to myself "OMG I kind of smell, okay when was the last time I showered? Thursday? What day is it anyway?" The good thing about all this is there is some balance, believe it or not. I don't feel the need to bring a baby monitor to listen for Davin when I leave the room to do laundry. As a mother of #2 I know if he crys for a moment, he'll live. If I don't get that bottle in his mouth the second he wakes up, he'll live. If his sleeper has a bit of spit up in it, he'll live...and so will I. So in that regard there is a reprieve from the insanity. But when he sleeps it's Evan's time. When baby doesn't need me Evan does. I've tryed my best to give him my attention when baby doesn't need it. But I've reached a bit of a burn out stage. I just don't feel like it!!! I'm tired, I'm grumpy, I'm hormonal! I don't want to clean up playdoe bits any more, I don't feel like reading or making crafts. I'm running out of idea's! I feel horrible for feeling this way. But what can I do? I just have to swallow it and read that book to Evan for the hundredth time, I have to clean up the playdoe bits, I have to find a craft idea some where in my half asleep brain.
I look into my future weeks with feelings of pure dread. What am I doing to do when hubby goes back to work? What am I going to do with Evan everyday? How am I going to make it through a day when Davin is awake till 1am, and wakes me up again at 5 am, then Evan is up at 6am? How am I going to function without setting the house on fire because I left the oven burner on? I've been told you just do it, you survive. I guess I'll see...
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